Marriage is Like a Bank: Top 10 Deposits to Make Today
by Jewell Powell
We’ve all heard that success is a journey, not a destination. I say that marriage is a journey, not a destination. In other words you have to constantly work at building a successful relationship; it doesn’t just happen. We know that the cares of this world: career, children, household chores, other family members, and more take up so much of our time that by the end of the day, we have nothing left to give to our spouses. In turn, our marriages are missing the very core of what it should have: love.
A successful marriage is not based on a couple having no challenges or disagreements. But it is based on how they communicate with one another day after day. The definition of communicate is: a process by which information is exchanged between individuals through a common system of symbols, signs, or behavior (words or deeds); to open into each other: connect. Therefore, communicating is connecting to one another on a daily basis to strengthen and enrich your marriage. I am not talking about the day in and day out of the routine of marriage – a peck on the cheek, “Have a nice day” - to a call in the middle of the day to discuss the children or why you will be home late - to a peck on the cheek and lights out.
Marriage is a lot like a bank account. A successful couple makes daily deposits – ways to make their marriage a priority. Below are ten ways to deposit love (and they’re FREE!):
1. Kiss them passionately
2. Send an ecard (http://www.myfuncards.com/, http://www.americangreetings.com/, http://www.123greetings.com/)
3. Watch their favorite show or do their favorite activity
4. Hug them and tell them how much you love and appreciate them
5. Make love to them (yes have SEX!)
6. Put the kids down early, fix a nice healthy dessert, light a candle, and just talk
7. Start a tradition (every week to take a walk, etc.)
8. Play a board game/cards
9. Find a poem or quote (internet, library, or write one) that will express your feelings (either send it or read it to them)
10. Pamper your spouse after work
Dating should not stop once you are married. Continue to court one another and offer tokens of love and appreciation. You don't have to spend a lot of money, but little signs of gratitude and courtship can go a long way to enhance your relationship.
© Jewell R. Powell, the Marriage Coach and author of Marriage 101: Building a Life Together by Faith. For more information, visit http://www.marriage101.us/
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
In July of 1992, Jewell met her Prince Charming at a Roy Rogers restaurant. When the couple decided to marry four years later, both were aware of the latest marriage statistics and the legacy of divorce that lay between them. Her parents divorced when she was four, after moving the family to Maryland, leaving her to be raised by a single mother. To circumvent the odds, they went through pre-marital counseling, attended church regularly and felt a strong love for one another. They believed they were ready for marriage.
While desiring to have a happily ever after, Jewell found life after marriage anything but a fairy tale. In 2001, she and her husband, Lewis, had been married for five years but were growing apart, after experiencing problems with infertility, sleeping in separate bedrooms and Lewis’s increasing disinterest in going to church. As she searched for answers to her marital troubles, Jewell found herself on a journey, seeking answers to save her marriage.
Despite a shaky beginning, the Powells now have a relationship with a strong foundation. After successfully resolving their marital problems, they started the Happily Ever After Marriage Ministry to help others do the same. Her new book, Marriage 101: Building a Life Together by Faith (Revell Books February 2009, ISBN 978-0-8007-3332-2, $13.99), offers hope and guidance to help transform broken relationships through the use of biblical wisdom in a simple workbook format.
Jewell serves as co-owner of Antiok Holdings, an emerging full-service management consulting firm, which she owns with her husband. She earned a Bachelor of Science in business from the University of Maryland and is pursuing a Master of Divinity. The Powells reside in southern Maryland with their two daughters.
ABOUT THE BOOK
Your marriage can be strong, healthy, happy, and blessed. Marriage coach Jewell Powell shows you how in this 8-week plan for marital success. She reveals how God’s truths can transform two individuals into the union he desires. Laying a spiritual foundation is crucial to your marriage. In Marriage 101: Building a Life Together by Faith, you will discover God’s purpose for marriage, how to develop godly character, how to communicate effectively, and much more. With biblical examples, study questions, and Scripture meditations perfect for individuals or couples, you will be challenged to examine areas in your life that may need change so that your marriage can thrive.
Follow the blog tour at http://bit.ly/Marriage101.
For more information about, visit Jewell at http://www.marriage101.us/.
BLOG TOUR DRAWING:
At the end of the week, One Winner (Randomly chosen from all blogs - see schedule at http://bit.ly/Marriage101) will receive a $30 DATE NIGHT certificate to the restaurant of their choice (Applebees, Chili's, Ruby Tuesday or Red Lobster) and a gift pack of books (includes Marriage 101, I Don't Want a Divorce, and Have a New Husband by Friday.)
You MUST leave an email address in the comments and answer the question:
How can a husband and wife find time for each other when they are both busy with work and family?
5 comments:
I schedule vacation days or take a sick day here and there when my hsuband gives me that look or holds me a little too long after the alarm goes off to get up. Of course I make sure it is a day that the kids go to school. We stay in bed, go eat brunch, go shopping.....basically act like we did when we were dating. We do not do this often enough I must admit.
How can a husband and wife find time for each other when they are both busy with work and family?
A husband and wife can find time for each other when they are busy with work and family by simply being creative about it. My husband and I really see each other in passing. I work days and he works nights. Usually, he is not home when I leave for work and when I get home its time for him to go to sleep.
Most of the time, my husband will stay up and sacrifice an hour or so of sleep so that we can see one another and talk when I come in from work. Sometimes, I sacrifice my lunch break for a couple of days so that on Friday I can leave work early to spend time with him before the kids come home from school.
In my opinion, it is not always the quantity of time that a husband and wife spend together, but the quality of the time spent. When we have our moments alone, we totally focus on one another. No televisions, no computer, and no phones.
Once a month, we have date night. Its usually an afternoon or evening after church. We go to dinner, a park for a picnic, or a nice drive. Whatever we do, we make sure that it is time well spent and we make every minute count.
Thanks ladies for your tips. I plan on using them.
My hubby works nights and it has been a strain on our marriage trying find time together.
At least once a month we have lunch together. Sometimes we just eat, but it's nice to seat across from him and not have to compete with the kids to talk with him.
I'm trying to bring back the date night, now that the kids are older.
LaShaunda, thank you for introducing SORMAG readers to Marriage 101 by Jewell Powell this week.
Thanks Lashaunda for allowing me to share my ministry with your readers/bloggers.
All the answers the ladies provided are great! It sounds like they care about their marriage and doing what is necessary to keep it going. That is what I like to hear!
Post a Comment